Addiction

I just put my children to bed…. Well my one child, my husband child falls asleep every night when we put Dolan to bed. Every.single.night… How does one get as tired as a baby? No we didn’t go out for New Years Eve if that’s what you’re thinking…. I think I’m getting old, I really had no desire to go out, get shitfaced and be miserable for the next day or two. I mean I wanted to go out, but just thinking of the repercussions made me feel like I had a hangover already.

But this post isn’t about getting old or getting drunk. Most of you who know me know that I don’t like too much of anything. I don’t like the thought of being addicted to anything nor anything having control over my body nor my life. I have always been told that too much of anything will kill you.

I’ve realized recently that I’ve been on Facebook nonstop for a while now. Anytime I get a split second, I get on there for no reason what so ever. I scroll through feed that I’ve already looked at three times that day. It’s sad really, I feel like I’m missing out on precious moments with my family just to see what people I haven’t seen in 10 years are posting…

I’ve tried logging out of Facebook, and seeing how long I can stay logged out, I’ve tried deleting the app and now finally I have deactivated it at 7 am this morning. I gave no warning to my friends or family and it’s 10pm and not a single person has noticed that I left. That doesn’t really bother me, but it makes me feel worse about my constant use of the mindless app. I love staying in touch and in contact with people I know but I don’t want to be on it constantly. I don’t want to put an app before my family. It’s ridiculous.

I’m not going to see how long I can stay deactivated nor am I seeking attention of any kind, and I will be coming back when I feel that I’m ready. I want to be able to decide when I really want to get on and how long I will stay on. I’ve wasted so much time on Facebook it’s unreal. Already today I’ve rearranged my linen closet, spent time with family and reorganized my pantry and cabinets. I’m certain that I wouldn’t have done it had I not deactivated.

So I want to ask my friends, is there anything that has control over you? Are you wasting time on ridiculous things? Are there productive things you could be doing if you weren’t constantly doing this thing that you’re doing? I’m not doing a new year new me thing, I’m doing a reevaluate how I spend my time thing…

I will keep you guys updated on my journey, in the meantime, is there something you need to give up?

Xoxo
AV

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